It all started in March of 2005. I went on a missions trip with JFA to San Antonio and Austin. And there was a man…passionate, godly, devoted to loving people, eager to listen, full of integrity. I was in awe. Never had I met a man like this. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what had so captured my attention (he’s also blond and from California – not my typical “crush”). Fast forward to June of 2005…keep in touch quite regularly with the missions team as a whole (hoping that Steve will read my emails to the group). I’m preparing to leave for Mexico for seven weeks, when I get an email. A personal email…simple really. Just a note asking to help support my trip. But I was definitely distracted. Another note while I’m gone, “praying for you, Rebeccah,” sent to the whole yahoo group. Praying with my roommate over our “prospective boy situations” while in Mexico. (what prospective situation? you may ask…I know, I know, I’m a girl) Fast forward once again. It is now January 2006. I have graduated. Now what? Phone call from David Lee, email from Tammy Cook – and I am now on my way to Wichita, KS, for an internship. You know, I wonder if Steve still partners with JFA? God, why are You letting our paths cross again? Hmm… Ah ha, Steve is courting someone. Good, then I won’t be distracted. He’s found the woman he’s going to marry, of course. Thank you, Lord. I guess there’s someone else for me. Except…why am I still distracted? This doesn’t work, Lord. Forgive me, change my heart. I can’t keep doing this. Help me to honor him – and let it go. April, 2006 – I don’t know if I really like him like that. I don’t think I’m attracted to him like that. I can’t handle this back and forth in my heart any more. “Just let it go.” Ok. May 10, 1006 – A ginormously large box of flowers arrives in the office, with an anonymous note. A mother’s day project, for me to take part in! “Create bouquets for each of the mother’s who make JFA what it is…save enough flowers to make one for the special woman with roots in three continents.” Several other detailed instructions, and a line at the end. “You will receive a phone call this weekend with appreciation and a request. I do hope you’ll answer it.” Ignore the ‘might have deeper meaning than it appears on the surface’ lines, and spend the afternoon making bouquets. “I’m sure he [of course it was him…who else would do something like this?] just wanted me to help him do something special for everyone.” May 12, 2006 – I get a phone call. Oh no, Lord! He likes me (maybe? maybe it’s nothing…wait, he must, he called Dad to ask for permission…). What do I do? I don’t feel what HE feels. I say no. California missions trip, one week later – it’s not awkward! This is great, no unspoken tension, we can be friends. Only…“Dad, I’m so confused! I said no to him. So why do I feel this way?” He’s amazing. And because he risked with me, I feel safe to actually consider him. I always wanted someone LIKE Steve…I just never thought it might BE Steve. June – Let yourself get to know him. Just be friends. Emails, a couple of work phone calls that turn into hours-long conversations. Heading to Wisconsin, July 3 – I’m so nervous. What if I see him and don’t feel anything? What if he doesn’t like me anymore? One look in his eyes: God, I do like him. Please help! 2 weeks together with JFA team, traveling Wisconsin and Colorado. I’ve never been so taken care of in all my life. I love ministering with him. “God, I don’t know if I can do this much longer. I need to be with him.” The same answer – “Just wait. And trust Me.” Ok. Late August – it’s not just a want. It’s a need. Not that I’m not complete anymore by myself, but all of a sudden something is missing. He’s coming in just a few days. What do I do? I can’t tell him, Lord…can I? It’s what he asked me to do back in May: “I’m going to trust what you’ve told me and not read into anything. You let me know if your feelings change.” Is it pursuit? Is it out of place? The book of Ruth just “happens” to be where I’m reading. Ok Lord. Permission from David – when should I tell him? After the Exhibit, Wednesday night. Phone call from my dad (who is in Russia on a business trip), Wednesday afternoon. Finally! The one person I haven’t talked with about this: “Bec, I think it’s time to tell him. Tonight or tomorrow.” Alright, if my dad says it’s time, then it MUST be time. Thursday morning – Steve takes me to the botanical gardens downtown (I cry twice before we ever get there. First, “thank you for blessing me with your beauty this morning.” Are you kidding me? No one’s ever said anything like that to me. Second, a prayer for our day and our time together as we’re sitting in the Starbuck’s drive thru…guess I shouldn’t have worn mascara today.). Nervous as anything – “What do I say? How do I tell him? I like you? The whole story? My stomach hurts.” I begin “the story.” The summer, the lessons, the changes in my heart, the healing that’s already taken place. 2 hours later…underneath the trees on a little side path. I can’t believe how hard it is to say two words. “I’m ready.” Tears in his eyes – the hug I’ve been longing for all summer. I cry again. Wow, Lord. Saturday evening, coffee with David and Diane. “I love this woman.” “We know.” Advice, encouragement, and laughter. This is so crazy. How is this happening? He’s calls my parents to ask about taking me on a date, and to fill them in on what’s happened. Sunday – a real date. And I didn’t plan any of it. Dinner at P.F. Chang’s, “Shakespeare in the Park,” singing on Paul and Trudy’s deck. He leaves on Monday. Two weeks shouldn’t be that hard, right? Phone “dates” – join me for tea? Watch the sunset. “Meet” me at the pond. Join me for my drive down the coast of California (a request made entirely in Norwegian. Steve: “You understood all that?” “Almost entirely”). Two weeks after I told him – on a plane to Houston. To meet my dad. And I won’t be with him. I don’t know quite what we are, but whatever this is, he’s doing it right. Mom and Josh met him back in March, and already love him. Has dinner with my whole family. Rachel’s question: “So…why do you like my sister?” Theological conversations with my dad and brother. No red flags, from anyone. Rachel loves him, Mom loves him, Josh loves him, and Dad approves. How did this happen? | 
